Above is the definition of the word “identity.”

I’ve been thinking about this a lot. What in fact makes up ones identity. What or whom does one find their identity in? Should there even be a “whom?”

What is my sense of self?

Let me rephrase that…

What do others perceive my sense of self to be?

Because the answer to those two questions can be completely different.

And then I would ask, which is most important? One knowing who they are? Or one knowing who other people think they are?

Are both of equal value?

Notice, I did not ask who or what do people think I am. I’ve decided that is not of significant value. I would only be concerned with that if the general consensus appears to be consistent within a large group of people; All within different and unique people groups.

Identity should not be in a thing.

Example: the car that I own nor the clothes that I wear should not give me any sort of definition. The shoes that I wear should not be what makes me a better or worse person. As a whole, they could not be a true reflection of my heart.

Then I think about people. Can my identity be wrapped up in people. Does who I hang out with reflect my sense of self in some way? I feel that it might be ignorant of me to say no, it does not. There’s a phrase “you are who you hang out with.” which I believe to be true to some extent. I think it takes a very strong person to not allow themselves to be influenced by others. But I guess we can really only sway one of two ways: be the influence or be the influenced. And I believe both are ok to some extent. We should be willing to grow and learn humbly but also be willing to share our life’s lessons with others…also with humility.

Now, it starts to get scary when we begin to put our self worth in some of these things.

Let me explain. Do I hang out with people because i believe it will enhance my reputation? Or do I hang out with specific people because I believe we can learn from one another? What is my heart’s position on the benefitting from one another.

The moment my identity, my sense of self worth, starts becoming about how my life (or maybe I should say reputation) can benefit from things, then I truly have no sense of self. Because then, at that point, I am gone. I don’t want others to find me, but merely something that I want others to like.

At the end of the day, I don’t want to go home thinking how awesome I might have been to others that day. I don’t want it to be about the things that I purchased that might make others like me.

At the end of the day, I want to be able to reflect on things that I love. Things that are of value. A contentment with life. A deep value and love for people.

Then, I’ve discovered that my best self…is when I’m not thinking about my self at all.

It’s when I don’t care about what others can do for me. It’s when I don’t care about what others think of me. My value comes when I reach beyond that. When life can become self-less.

So I guess that’s what I’m getting to. I want MY identity to be just that …having a sense of selflessness.

And even more than that…being content with being selfless. Letting go. And giving myself away.

Being ok with getting nothing back in return.

That’s an identity I would like to reflect.

One that challenges others. But humbly.

I have a lot of work to do. But I’m willing.

I’ve decided that 2011 was one of my best years so far. In so many ways. I had several accomplishments and honestly am the most content my heart has ever been. In acknowledging this, I am very conscious of my goal for 2012. And there is only 1.

To give back.

I want this year to be a year of self sacrifice and of blessing others. Whatever that looks like. Whether it be financially. In prayer. In love. In music. Whatever. So if you have a need, please feel free to reach out. I want to be the hand that is here to help. Here to support. Here to bless.

That is all.